Tuesday, November 20, 2012

#2. Grow in my faith.

This is another one of those hard to cross off goals... I will always be working on this one, but I have come to a point where I want to share how God has worked in my life. It's a personal one. I'm a work in progree. Special treat: It's a sneak peak into my testimony which I am looking forward to sharing very soon!

Over the past few months, I (and quite a few other wonderful ladies) have been on a journey to "Calm our anxious hearts." This is a wonderful study for anyone who struggles with worry or anxiety (and who doesn't at some point) The book is written by Linda Dillow. Here's a link to the book on Amazon. Ok enough of that promo.

The study has really challenged me at just the perfect time. The past two years have been amazing (I'll tell more about that in my testimony) but over the past few months, I have really struggled with "my path" and trying to plan out the future. Epic fail. What I really needed to learn is that Charity has a tendency to really mess things up, but God has the perfect path for me.

Sunday night, as we completed the last chapter, I began to write words that described the journey for me. Here's the list just as I wrote them, and I'll explain them along the way.

THANKFULNESS & PRAYER - Isn't God just awesome with his timing. Happy early Thanksgiving. There is no way you can worry while you are being thankful. There is also no way you can worry while in prayer. So now, when I am anxious or facing what seems like a fork in the road, I stop and identify that worry, thank God for all the blessings in my life and say a prayer turning that worry over to Christ. I may have to do that over and over again, but it's way better than the alternative.

PERSPECTIVE & FOCUS- I wear contacts - I am blind without them. The way I "see things" with no contacts is completely different from the clear vision that I have with them in. Without the contacts, I can't really see where I am going. Many people today are nearsighted, not in their eye sight but in their life focus. Who are my eyes set on? What do I focus on? What perspective do I have? Am I walking through life in a blur?

FAITH & TRUST - Faith is the foundation of the Christian walk, but how many of us actually understand our faith. Dictionary.com gives the following definitions of faith:
1. confidence or trust in a person or thing: faith in another's ability.
2. belief that is not based on proof: He had faith that the hypothesis would be substantiated by fact.
3. belief in God or in the doctrines or teachings of religion, the firm faith of the Pilgrims.
4. belief in anything, as a code of ethics, standards of merit, etc.: to be of the same faith with someone concerning honesty.
5. a system of religious belief: the Christian faith; the Jewish faith.
 
Lidna Dillow asked several woman how they defined faith:
Faith is believing God is true to his word when my feelings are screaming something else.
Faith is the certain belief in what I know to be true but cannot at that moment see or touch.
Faith is completing my small part of the picture puzzle without being able to see the finished product.
 
Charity's definition FAITH = TRUST. Trust isn't easy. Humans are flawed. I'm flawed. It's hard to trust people, but trust becomes much easier when you add the words "In God". Trust in God. He's the only one with no character flaws. He's the only one with the perfect plan for each of our lives.
 
Ok... saving on blog length... Here's some more of the words I wrote and then I'll wrap up with two final words.
 
CONTENTMENT, TRANSFORMED, ACCEPTANCE OF THE PAST, RELINQUISH THE FUTURE, HUMBLE, ACT OF WORSHIP
 
YIELDING CONTROL - BLESSED CONTROLLER. I am a bit of a control freak. Admitting you have a problem is the first step to overcoming :) I want to know. I want to be in charge. It's just a character flaw of mine. But in order to grow my faith... I have to relinquish control. Hard. Tough. Yuck. Fight. Kick. Will be working on daily, but I am relinquishing control to the blessed controller. The one who is in control of all things and I can rest in Him and His goodness.
 
So there's my heart. Growing. Transforming.

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